My lifes been horrible lately, help?

Well I really need to vent. I'm in my freshman year and i've been dealing but sometimes I just have moments where I get really depressed. So everyone says to not take your high school years for granted and I'm scared that I'm going to be miserable when I grow up because I didn't have an "enjoyable experience". To start off with I feel so small and unpopular, not like I did in middle school. All my good friends turned into druggys, I have no REAL friends in my cles but I've learned to deal. I don't play sports. My bestfriend in the whole world isn't treating me like she use too. I like this guy and she liked him before but got over it and she knows and I think she's mad at me for it but wont admit it. I don't know anyone older then me and I have 2 close friends that do and I also love them very much so I want to try hanging out with them. And I have confidence issues where I feel like I'm ugly or something but I was always very confident, like I feel so uncomfortable walking in the halls with older people. I write music and have been doing great with it and I'm getting singing lessons in january and I know this is what I want to do. I don't think I want to collage, my plan is to try and get my songs out there but I feel like if that doesn't work or it does I'll still feel empty. I talk to my mom about everything but I haven't told her how I feel because I get embarred. Tomorrow I'm having a day with her, do you think I should talk to her? And do you have any advise? Sorry for the long thing, thank you everyone.